A review of Wii Virtual Console titles released in September 2007.

-- By Myrtle T. Blinkin,
Senior Citizen

September 3rd, 2007

Adventure Island, Hudson Soft, NES:
"What street is that on? Maple? I live on Maple. Is it on Maple? Is that where the Foodland used to be? You know they tore that down after those kids got sick."
Donkey Kong Jr. Math, Nintendo, NES:
"The young man upstairs runs a math lab. He is such a nice young man, so I gave him an extra free sample I got from the Farmer's Market this morning. They were passing out dough nuts made with apple cider."
Landstalker: The Treasures of King Nole, Sega, Sega Genesis:
"Have you seen my cat? He never finishes his can of cat food any more. I haven't seen him in months because he sleeps in the upstairs bedroom."
Bonk 3: Bonk's Big Adventure, Hudson Soft, TurboGrafx-16:
"All senior citizens should have a Life Watch pendant. Life. Watch. Pen. Dant."

September 10th, 2007

NES Play Action Football, Nintendo, NES:
"That nice woman at the bank says I should have my social security check directly deposited, but the computers are only one step away from being robots. We lost President Taft to the robots."
Sonic the Hedgehog 3, Sega, Sega Genesis:
"Have some soup, honey. I'll fix you some tea. Eat. Eat."
Neutopia II, Hudson Soft, TurboGrafx-16:
"The Methodist church across town hosts Two Card Tuesdays on Tuesday. It's the best bingo in town. Is it Tuesday or Thursday?"

September 17th, 2007

Yoshi's Story, Nintendo, Nintendo 64:
"Your uncle was stationed on the Ho Chi Minh trail. Have you visited him lately? He misses you when he's not screaming. The doctors say he has a stress order, and he isn't lazy at all."
Super Thunder Blade, Sega, Sega Genesis:
"My first husband used to drive a Thunder Blade. That car lasted us a full three years, and it never broke down once until it blew up. Boom! Ha, ha. I tell you, that's the way cars are supposed to be made. American cars."
World Class Baseball, Hudson Soft, TurboGrafx-16:
"Oh, I love baseball. My daddy took me to see a Naps game when I was a little girl. That's when that fella got hit with the ball and died, you know. Do they let the blacks play now?"

September 24th, 2007

Kirby's Avalanche, Nintendo, SNES:
"Your great aunt used to live in Kirby, Texas. They have lots of pecans there. Your aunt died under an avalanche of pecans. Would you like a pecan cookie, son? They have pecans in them."
Streets of Rage 3, Sega, Sega Genesis:
"The raccoons in the attic talk to me. The raccoons in the attic talk to me. No, I did not just tell you that. That was somebody else. OH, FORGET IT."
Legend of Hero Tonma, Irem, TurboGrafx-16:
"Jack Benny was my hero, and he made me laugh and laugh and laugh. His father was a haberdasher. Do you know what that is? You better not or gam-gam will box your ears. Sinner."

-- Myrtle T. Blinkin {10-2007}

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