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We've published close to 700 articles since we started this Webazine in April of '02. Which is an awful lot, especially if you're a new reader who wants to get caught up. You only wanna read the good stuff—or at least, the most important stuff. Which is why Classic 'Cola exists: to highlight some of the forgotten gems and memorable moments of GameCola's five-year-plus history. To that end, we're publishing one old article here a month—in chronological order, starting from Issue #1—to show you some of our best (or, at least, most significant) writings to-date. (And we're running them completely unedited, as painful as that is.) Download of the Bimonth Mr. Face Advance (click to download) Background: A long long time ago, on an ancient, destroyed, website, there lived a happy little smiley face by the name of "Mr. Face." Now Mr. Face was a kind enough soul, never bothering anyone, and pretty much minding his own business. He lived a pretty uneventful life until one dreadful day when some bastard game players like you decided to shoot him... in the face! Assholes. Anyway, one shot to the head was not enough for the psychos, they shot over and over and over until the poor yellow smiley couldn't take it anymore and exploded... That was the last we saw of the lovable face for years to come. Present Day: Mr. Face has returned!
And I'll be damned if he isn't pissed off like no other. How would you
feel if you got shot in the face until you exploded? I thought so. This
time around Mr. Face is not just sitting around and being shot, no, he
is jumping all over the place... like a rabbit. A very, very mad rabbit.
We now leave the decision up to you, bastard game player. Do you leave
the face alone and hope he cools off? Or do you prove you are the
biggest asshole in the world and kill him... again! -- Matt Gardner {06-2002} Rate this article — |
