GameCola: Captain Eric's Super Thumbs (5-8-1)

-- by Eric Regan

WELCOME! to the newest and GRANDEST edition of Super Thumbs to be seen by human eyes...ever! In this edition I will bring some FPS ACTION to your ever-loving attention! Now they probably aren't the games you think of when someone says FPS! But they are a part of the genre, so they shall be reviewed!

But that's not all! I also have some games from the place they like to call Japan, home of the very strange videogames. So sit back and enjoy the THUMBS. Begin NOW.

Red Faction (PS2)

Red Faction was one of the earliest first-person shooters to hit the PlayStation 2. Playing it now really shows this and how much work as been put into the genre since then. Still, Red Faction is a very solid FPS and one of the more enjoyable console FPSs of its time. It is not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but it is fun. The controls are not the greatest, however, and I did find myself looking at the ground while trying to aim more often that I would have liked. The graphics are OK but nothing stunning or a masterpiece or anything. But they do not take anything away from the game and aren't something you will be paying extra attention to while you're playing, so that is always a plus.

The game features a good variety of weapons and a decent amount of levels, though just about every FPS could use some more maps; everyone loves the maps! Some maps appeal more than others, as there are a few maps that I just completely suck on, and others where I can take a few minutes out of the endless stream of deaths to get a few kills in. So while it may not be worth checking out now that there are so many newer and better games in its genre, Red Faction still is pretty fun.

Captain Eric's Super Thumbs say... Thumbs Up!

Tribes: Aerial Assault (PS2)

Now on to a first-person shooter that never was all that great. Tribes was a pretty decent, playable game on the PC; however, this version on the PlayStation 2 really showcases the flaws console FPSs can have. First off, the maps are so huge in this game for a time when online capabilities for consoles weren't really...well...alive. This makes for lots of walking around searching for enemies. The controls are really bad in this game as well. They are very sensitive so, as you can imagine, my mad skillz had my weapon flailing all about the screen in just about any unthinkable angle ever thought possible. Well you know, if they were thinkable.

I really could not stomach much of this game, to be honest, as it just wasn't all that fun. It does feature jetpacks, though! WOO!! The weapons will be familiar to those who love Tribes, but may take some learning for people who continue to deny the existence of this series, as the series does have a few odd unique weapons.

In the end the game really is just a really bad console version of a decent PC game. If you have any inclination that you would enjoy a Tribes game...don't choose this one—it should be avoided at all costs!

Captain Eric's Super Thumbs say... Thumbs Down.

Time Splitters: Future Perfect (PS2)

Time Splitters is a lot newer than the other FPS's I have reviewed in this edition so far! Now it is a lot better in controls and graphics than the other two, but I have to admit there are tons of games out there that are better. Now it probably isn't the best thing to say that this new game has some pretty usual gameplay mechanics, but while it may not be anything groundbreaking in it's genre, it is still is pretty fun. It has all the weapons you are probably used to in most other FPSs, only there are about three different sets of them because of how the game takes place over lots of different time periods via time traveling ACTION!

The time traveling bit doesn't enhance the multiplayer much as...well...the multiplayer is much like all other FPS multiplayer where it's all KILL KILL KILL. However, the time traveling really makes the single-player version of this game different than other games of this genre and also really fun. While a lot of other FPSs have single-player modes that I just abandon after about the third or fourth mission, Time Splitters'' small innovations and different looks and styles make it very easy to have a enjoyable time all the way through while also having some very entertaining deathmatches. While it may not be GoldenEye on N64, it is still pretty enjoyable.

Captain Eric's Super Thumbs say... Thumbs Up!

Crimson Sea 2 (PS2)

This game is NOT a first-person shooter, but rather it's lumped into that rather large unidentified genre of "action." It is one of those action games that commonly comes out of Japan were...well...you kill LOTS and LOTS of stuff really fast so that you can kill many more things...fast. It is a mission-based game and each mission has its own little objective. However, the downfall is that the missions aren't all that different and mostly just you killing things fast and visiting different parts of the map to talk to different people to complete objectives.

The maps aren't all that different and there is only maybe three or so completely different maps. There is a bit of customizing with the leveling up of weapons and the fact that you have a blade weapon can help cut the monotony down a bit. However, it does get old fast, and while the story is interesting enough not much progresses through each mission. They stories come in bulk after beating a certain percent of an area or moving on to a new area. So you can have some fun with this game but there is just too much of the same to say things game is good

Captain Eric's Super Thumbs Say... Thumbs Down.

Chibi Robo! (GCN)

WOOOO!! CHIBI ROBO! Who wants to do some cllleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaning!? Not me. Sorry. While the idea of the game sounds really really terrible and unfun, the first few minutes of this game were pretty fun...well...more fun than I thought it would be, at least. However, then the battery got low. Friggin' battery—it really is the biggest downfall of this game. Running around and cleaning and exploring the huge house would be pretty fun if I didn't have to run back every three seconds to recharge and then go through various cutscenes of the next day or whatever.

There is some fun to be found in this game, and it is a lot better than it sounds, but beyond the novelty of learning the different aspects of the game it is hard to keep yourself interested in it. So if you are really tired of games that involve lots of bloodshed and other things and are looking for a change of pace, I SUPPOSE this game might be for you. But I am not making any promises. It is a cute idea and a cute game, but not really anything beyond that. It's just one of those games, like Katamari, that people love because it's different and not because it is like, you know, good.

Captain Eric's Super Thumbs Say... Thumbs Down.

Well! There you have it! Some unkind words for a little cute robot and some others and some nice words thrown in there as well. Wooo nice words—gotta love them.

Now, you're thinking that the sheer awesomeness that is this issue could never EVER be topped and there would be no point in ever reading another word written by me ever again! But, alas you are wrong because, word-by-word, I am ALWAYS just getting even better! SO that means you NEED to come back next month and AGAIN read those delicious writings that I dole out each month here at THE COLA!

-- Eric Regan {08-01-2006}