GameCola: Captain Eric's Super Thumbs (5-7-1)

-- by Eric Regan

Welcome to the next installment of the most awe-inspiring and titillating article about videogames that has EVER existed! Here at the THUMBS we redefine "super OMGOMGOMGAWESOME" every month, and this month will be no different! With the sudden EXPLOSION of PC games on the pages of the 'Cola, I am going all-out to bring you TWO PC games of my own! OK, well, two isn't all that much, but everything has to start somewhere! So brace yourself, because you're about to enlightened by...THE THUMBS.

Planescape: Torment (PC)

This is one of those computer RPG games that are not like the console RPG games that most are used too. Torment uses the same engine as the Baldur's Gate and Icewind Dale games, and things like that. It uses those wonderful AD&D rules. Still, Torment is very much its own game and one of the most entertaining games of its style. First off, it is a lot easier to talk your way through this game, and there are significantly less fights, if you so choose that path. There still are a fair amount of battles either way, none of which are insanely difficult, especially when your party balloons to six members. You gain a lot of you experience completing the many different quests in the game or other actions, so if you do choose not to go on killing rampages, your character will still be able to grow in strength and skill.

The storyline is pretty unique and interesting. You are immortal, but you can die; you just come back. Your mission is to straighten this all out and find out just why exactly this happens. You don't pick just one class in this game, either; you can change between a mage, warrior or thief by training at almost any point in the game, if you hang out with the right people.

Overall it is a pretty good game that is worth a look at if you enjoy rich and different storylines. If you just want to bash stuff, however, you might want to look for something else.

Captain Eric's Super Thumb says...Thumbs Up!

Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath (MXB)

At first look, you might think this is just another FPS game with some gimmicky ammo. While that is PARTLY true, it is not the entire story. The game offers a lot more than just shooting fuzzle wuzzles and zap bees or whatever the call the different ammo types in the game, and it also just isn't a shooter. It also has a third-person mode where you can run around and do some platforming and double jumps to get your kicks in as well. It is a pretty average game where you just do your missions shooting stuff and such. However, you don't really kill the enemies; rather, you suck them up into something and get bounties on them. This can get rather annoying when there are quite a few around, because you can only do this while they are stunned and stunning doesn't last forever! Once you get the hang of it, though, it's manageable, while nothing great. The controls are pretty easy after a while as well, but the jumping is a bit ackward and slow, but you can leap great distances.

So while the game is pretty mediocre, it is doomed by the fact that it seems to be geared towards the forgetful and those possessing rock-like intelligence, as every button you push will have the main character, Stranger, telling you what you are supposed to be doing in his very slow John Wayne rip-off of a voice. Also, you can talk to other characters, who will berate you with some "funny" sayings but are not all that helpful usually. These annoying attributes, coupled with the game's average gameplay and funness, pretty much make it only decent for kids, and well, i just am not a kid anymore, sadly enough.

Captain Eric's Super Thumb says...Thumbs Down.

Rise of Nations: Rise of Legends (PC)

This is a new real-time Strategy game made by the Rise of Nations people, but it's a lot different from its predecessor. While Rise of Nations was more like an adaptation of Age of Empires, this game is more of a adaptation of Starcraft. And it is pretty fun! If you've played Starcraft or, well, any RTS, then you pretty much know how the game works. It does have all that latest and greatest gadgets that all the newer RTSs have, such as researching, technology, upgrades, queues and all of that.

Another thing about this game is that is it utterly HUGE, and the size of your forces can grow to incredible size. It is worldwide combat on a epic scale, which is in itself enough to get this game a THUMB UP! The story is pretty general and not terribly interesting, but the different scenarios you encounter with the campaign mode are pretty fun, and some are a change of pace from the complete destruction of your enemy. So while you may not care if you "hero" lives or dies and dies...and dies again, you should have a lot of fun experiencing epic level combat.

Captain Eric's Super Thumb says...Thumbs Up!

Mario Party 7 (GCN)

Wooooo!! It is Mario Paarty! Everyone's favoooorite game! OK seriously, why does this game exist and WHY are there SEVEN of them. One is enough for me. Just because it is one of the few games you can play with more than two people doesn't make it any more fun or warrant SIX sequels of VASTLY different gameplay. Yeah you see those caps? They are trying to tell you something. This game is the SEVENTH version of the same old song and dance that just keeps getting worse and worse with age. They need to stop tarnishing the entertainment value of Mario and just give up with making these abomination of games. Sure if you loooove games that suck but allow you to share the suck with your friends, you might be a big fan of this game; however that's just not my style.

Captain Eric's Super Thumb says...Thumbs Down.

Monster Hunter (PS2)

When I first played this game, I thought it was hastily made and not all that interesting; but upon playing it again I found it to be pretty entertaining, especially if you connect online with it and have some friends to bring along. Basically, the game is hunting large wyverns for fun and for their goods so you can make better armor and weapons, thus looking cooler as you kill them again and again. So yeah, I suppose it does get rather tedious and runs out it's welcome; but before it does that you will have a lot of fun with it.

The action style combat system is pretty good once you get used to the unorthodox controls. I mean, the joystick is your attack button? ABSOLUTE INSANITY! But the controls do give you a bigger feeling of being part of taking down these huge beasts, and it is fun enough that I wouldn't mind seeing it on some other games as well. Other than hacking and slashing at the uberdinos, there is also some strategic ways to meet these goals such as setting traps, planting bombs and using various kinds of status aliments and grenades to weaken and confuse these deadly prey.

If you are someone who doesn't get bored fast you will really enjoy this game; for everyone else you still will be able to get a good amount of entertainment from it, just stay away from all anyone who brags that they have put 2000+ hours into it...that's just...FREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKY!

Captain Eric's Super Thumb says...Thumbs Up!

Well, that ends the first installment of the new and improved SUPER THUMBS! Come back next month where it gets even NEWER and more improved! I know how unlikely that seems because, well, the THUMBS are so great as it is!

-- Eric Regan {07-01-2006}